collect the color balls
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.
Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
Mr. and Mrs. Brown
Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. Then he started looking in and under cars until a police man approached him and asked, "What are you doing?" "Playing a game," the boy replied. "What is your name?" the officer questioned. "Mind Your Own Business." Furious the policeman inquired, "Are you looking for trouble?!" The boy replied, "Why, yes."
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.