clean and correct the teeth
Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'