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New jokes

Chinese girl
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Mummy┬┤s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.

Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison

Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.

50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.