Homer Simpson is crying
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Reporter vs man
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!