Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.