Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin." Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."