Weird man looking
#weird #bored #strange #exhausted #man #annoyed #thinking #feature #emotion #people
Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!
Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death?
Employee: No, because there is no proof of it.
Boss: Well there is now !
Employee: How?
Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left
DonĀ“t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.
Kids conversation
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ."
Kid 1: "As if."
Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister."
Kid 1: "I don't have a sister."
Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.