HYPNOTIZED

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Hypnotized

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New jokes

Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

A BLONDE & HER THERMOS
A blonde notices that her coworker has a thermos, so she asks him what it's for. He responds, "It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The blonde immediately buys one for herself. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it. Her coworker asks, "What do you have in it?" She replies, "Soup and ice cream."

Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

Trick-or-treating
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."

Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.