"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"
Lost in desert
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
How were people born
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.