BYE

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Bye

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New jokes

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!

MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"

Harry Potter
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.

Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!