DOG AS SEAL

Dog as seal

#animal #funny #shake #shaking #dog #crazy #seal #animals #feature #activities

New jokes

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.

Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.