HAPPY GIRLS

Happy girls

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New jokes

Chinese girl
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Birthday
Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.