Happy woman screaming
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.
Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Guys on the roof
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy's turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof.