Cute seal yawning and waking up
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
Woman in the mirror
A woman looks in the mirror and says I look fat and then asks her husband to give her a compliment he says ok you have perfect eye sight.
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!