Cute walking bear
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"