BIG ASSES

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Big asses

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New jokes

Private investigator
A guy believed that his wife is cheating on him, so he hired a private investigator. The cheapest he could find was a Chinese man. This was the Chinese PI's report about what he found: "Most honorable, sir. You leave house. I watch house. He come to house. I watch. He and she leave house. I follow. He and she go in hotel. I climb tree. I look in window. He kiss she. He strip she. She strip he. He play with she. She play with he. I play with me. I fall out tree. I not see. No fee. Cheng Lee."

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.

Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99

Christmas gift
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"

Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.