HOMER IS BUYING

Homer is buying

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New jokes

How were people born
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99

Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!