Manny falls in love
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.
Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!
Bug in soup
A boy asks his father, "Dad, are bugs good to eat?" "That's disgusting. Don't talk about things like that over dinner," the dad replies. After dinner the father asks, "Now, son, what did you want to ask me?" "Oh, nothing," the boy says. "There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone."