Nemo and dori
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.