TURTLE NEMO

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Turtle nemo

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New jokes

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

DonĀ“t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

How were people born
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."

Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.