Woman sends the kisses
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.
Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99
Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.