Man crossing the river
How were people born
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family."
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.
Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."