GIRL FALLS DOWN

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Girl falls down

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New jokes

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Woman in the mirror
A woman looks in the mirror and says I look fat and then asks her husband to give her a compliment he says ok you have perfect eye sight.

Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!

MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.