Man does the shopping
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin." Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Guys on the roof
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy's turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof.
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."
Woman in the mirror
A woman looks in the mirror and says I look fat and then asks her husband to give her a compliment he says ok you have perfect eye sight.
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.