Angry Taylor Swift
#funny #angry #woman #women #mad #upset #actress #singer #feature #emotion #people #celebrities
Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house?
Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!
MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.
Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.
Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Six."
Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven!"
Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"
Mummy´s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!