Crazy woman dancing
Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."
Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.