Angry panda cooking
Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left
Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.