BORED MAN

Bored man

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New jokes

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!

Beans
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."

Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!

Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

MY WIFE AND I ARE REALLY IN SYNC
If my wife has too much to drink at a party, starts yapping a little too much, I don't have to say anything... three little leg squeezes, she knows that means 'Put a sock in it, drunkie, time for you to wrap it up.' Somebody didn't have dinner like I suggested, now you're spouting off at the mouth divulging all the family secrets. You need to pipe down or we've got to f**king leave.

Mexican sport
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.