A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."
Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Value of pi
Teacher: What is the value of Pi? Student: Depending on what pie. Usually is $12.99
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.