DOG IS DRUNK

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Dog is drunk

#animal #white #look #looking #funny #hungry #dog #crazy #drunk #hypnotized #animals #color #activities #feature #food #emotion

New jokes

Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Six." Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven!" Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!" Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"

Christmas
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.

Woman in the mirror
A woman looks in the mirror and says I look fat and then asks her husband to give her a compliment he says ok you have perfect eye sight.

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left