Elephant asks the question
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.