Ferret in man hands
Where do babies come from
A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend. “Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?” “Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
How is Christmas like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.