Tom plays the golf
Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman. Boy: Why do you look so fat? Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me. Boy: Is it a good baby? Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby. Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.
What is a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross-country.
A little kid was out trick-or-treating on Halloween dressed as a pirate. He rang a house's doorbell and the door was opened by a lady. "Oh, how cute! A little pirate! And where are your buccaneers?" she asked. The boy replied, "Under my buckin' hat."