SEAL IS SMILING

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Seal is smiling

#cute #animal #sweet #funny #yawn #yawning #satisfied #cartoon #seal #happy #excited #hypnotized #feature #animals #activities #emotion #things

New jokes

Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.

LIGHTS OFF
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Santas sack
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Beans
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."