LION CAT

Lion cat

#cat #animal #funny #yawn #yawning #lie #lying #bored #tired #angry #lion #mad #yellow #animals #feature #activities #emotion #color

New jokes

Momma
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.

Mummy´s music
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison

Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Six." Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven!" Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!" Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"

Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.