SEAL IS SLEEPING

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Seal is sleeping

#cute #animal #sweet #white #sleep #sleeping #lie #lying #tired #exhausted #snow #beauty #satisfied #winter #seal #feature #animals #color #activities #emotion #winter

New jokes

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"

Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left

Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Six." Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven!" Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!" Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"

Chinese girl
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!