Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.