CAT WATCHING

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Weird cat watching

#cat #cute #cats #animal #sweet #cute cat #weird #magic #funny #funny cat #animals #feature

New jokes

50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

Birthday
Why did I get divorced? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.

Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.

Man vs priest
Man to his priest: “Yesterday I sinned with an 18 year old girl.” The priest: “Squeeze 18 lemons and drink the juice all at once.” Man: “And that frees me from my sin?” Priest: “No, but it frees your face from that dirty grin.

Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.

Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.

Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.