Cat and man wandering
#cat #cute #cats #animal #cute cat #weird #waggle #funny #funny cat #fun #man #animals #feature #activities #people
Google
Q: Is Google male or female?
A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
Witches
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!
Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Six."
Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven!"
Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"
Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
Fat momma
Your momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, "I need your weight not your phone number."
Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.