Astronaut vs bin
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
Q: What is a mummy's favorite type of music? A: Wrap!
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.
Your momma is so short, when she went to meet Santa he said, "Go back to work!"
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."