Strange lights on the building
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison
Pee in the shower
Q: Who cares if you pee in the shower? A: The bride and all her guests, apparently.
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.
Don´t be racist
Don't be racist; racism is a crime; and crime is for black people.
Q: How does Albus get into Hogwarts? A: Through the Dumble-door.
Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!