Baking cookies
#sweet #hungry #woman #meal #food #cooking #blonde #ass #honey #feature #food #people #activities
Months
Q: Can February march? A: No, but April may.
Pregnant woman
A 3 years old boy sits near a pregnant woman.
Boy: Why do you look so fat?
Pregnant woman: I have a baby inside me.
Boy: Is it a good baby?
Pregnant woman: Yes, it is a very good baby.
Boy: Then why did you eat it?!
Google
Q: Is Google male or female?
A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.
Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
Beans
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?"
Student: "Meat!"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?"
Student: "Bacon!"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
Student: "Homework!"
Envelope
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it?
A: Envelope.
Claustrophobic
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.