Parrot in chocolate
Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!
Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.
Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"