DANCE LIKE NO ONE IS WATCHING

Dance like no one is watching

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New jokes

Google
Q: Is Google male or female? A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!

Microwave oven
Yo momma is so stupid when an intruder broke into her house, she ran downstairs, dialed 9-1-1 on the microwave, and couldn't find the "CALL" button.

Woman in the mirror
A woman looks in the mirror and says I look fat and then asks her husband to give her a compliment he says ok you have perfect eye sight.

Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.

Mr. and Mrs. Brown
Mr. and Mrs. Brown had two sons. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two boys decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for his brother behind garbage cans and bushes. Then he started looking in and under cars until a police man approached him and asked, "What are you doing?" "Playing a game," the boy replied. "What is your name?" the officer questioned. "Mind Your Own Business." Furious the policeman inquired, "Are you looking for trouble?!" The boy replied, "Why, yes."