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New jokes

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.

Beans
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."

Cath the train
A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.” The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one."

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Cheap hotels
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.

Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.