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New jokes

Woman in the mirror
A woman looks in the mirror and says I look fat and then asks her husband to give her a compliment he says ok you have perfect eye sight.

Snowman and vampire
What do get if you cross a Snowman with a Vampire? Frostbite.

Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.

Adele
Q: Why did Adele cross the road? A: To sing, "Hello from the other side!"

Skeleton order
Q: What does a skeleton order at a restaurant? A: Spare ribs!

Ghosts as cheerleaders
Q: Why are ghosts such good cheerleaders? A: Because they have a lot of spirit!

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!

Kids conversation
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin." Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."