Q: What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? A: Envelope.
Ghosts as liars
Q: Why are ghosts bad liars? A: You can see right through them.
Teacher and students
Teacher: "Kids, what does the chicken give you?" Student: "Meat!" Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pig give you?" Student: "Bacon!" Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?" Student: "Homework!"
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!
Q: What do cheap hotels and designer jeans have in common? A: No ballroom.
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.
Q: Why did the witches' team lose the baseball game? A: Their bats flew away.
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!