PHOTO VS REALITY

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Photo vs reality

#cute #sweet #funny #woman #happy #excited #shower #cool #take a photo #swimming suit #feature #people #emotion #activities #things

New jokes

Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven." Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Six." Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?" Johnny: "Seven!" Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!" Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"

Tampons
"Mom, where do tampons go?" "Where the babies come from, darling." "In the stork?"

Tears in eyes
My friend told me he gets tears in his eyes whenever his partner makes tender love to him. At first I thought he was an overemotional sissy, then I remembered: He's still in prison

Stupid momma
Your momma is so stupid when I told her Christmas is right around the corner she went looking for it.

Santas sack
Q: Why is Santa Claus' sack so big? A: He only comes once a year.

Kangaroo
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Boss and employee
Boss: Do you believe in life after death? Employee: No, because there is no proof of it. Boss: Well there is now ! Employee: How? Boss: When you left yesterday saying that you have to go to your uncle's funeral, your uncle came here looking for you after you left