Snow car face
#funny #snow #car #winter #happy #feature #winter #vehicle #emotion
Tiger Woods vs Santa
Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.
Elves in school
Q: What do elves learn in school? Q: What do elves learn in school? A: The Elfabet.
Naughty girls
Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
Cats exercise
Teacher: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven."
Teacher: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Six."
Teacher: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Johnny: "Seven!"
Teacher: "Johnny, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Johnny: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"
Athletes
If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? Missletoe!
Christmas gift
A little kids sends a letter to Santa that says: "Dear Santa I want a brother for Christmas." Santa writes back, "Dear Timmy send me me your mommy."
Turkey
Why isn't the turkey hungry at Thanksgiving? Because he's already stuffed!
Beans
A teacher asked her students to use the word "beans" in a sentence. "My father grows beans," said one girl. "My mother cooks beans," said a boy. A third student spoke up, "We are all human beans."