OMELETTE

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Omelette

#cute #animal #sweet #eat #eating #sleep #sleeping #bed #tired #exhausted #meal #food #delicious #bear #feature #animals #food #activities #things #emotion

New jokes

Snowman snowwoman
What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.

LIGHTS OFF
I'm so in love with my boyfriend right now. Everything is perfect, but we want totally different things in bed. Like, he's always turning the lights on, you know what I'm saying? And I shut them off, and he turns them on, and the other day, he's like, 'Amy, why are you so shy? You know, you have a beautiful body.' I was like, 'Oh my god, you're so cute. You think I don't want you to see me?'

Helium
I just read a book about Helium. It was so good that I can't put it down.

Skeleton
Q: Why did the skeleton cross the road? A: To get to the body shop.

50 cent
Yo momma's so stupid, she put two quarters in her ears and thought she was listening to 50 Cent.

Chinese girl
I asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

School
Mother: "How was school today, Patrick?" Patrick: "It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!" Mother: "Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?" Patrick: "What school?"

Hamburgers
Q: Why do hamburgers go to the gym A: To get better buns!